Busy: Fashion Week, Award Season, V-Day and Everything Else

There's a lot going on. EVERYWHERE. In NYC, you've got Mercedes Benz Fashion Week that began on Friday. On the west coast, it's award season with the Grammys wrapping up and the Oscars about to take place. You've also got NBA All Star weekend taking place in Arizona right now and of course this weekend LOVE was in the air with Valentine's Day. Hope everyone had an awesome weekend and had an even more fabulous Valentine's Day!

Let's get back to our regularly scheduled blog program.

My Exciting Weekend

Actually, not really. Before I headed to the holiday party my friend Anna hosted, I took a nap on the couch. There's nothing like a good slumber on your couch while the TV watches you. I was exhausted after shopping at Home Depot and figuring out how to put together the set for my show.



On Friday night, the Fiance rented "The Women" which is seriously one of the best movies I've seen this year. It covers all the relationships we have as women - mother, daughter, wife and friend. If you haven't seen it, I suggest picking it up and watching it with your closest girlfriends or your mother/daughter. It'll put all the relationships you have in total perspective.

Also, Annette Bening (who stars in the film) has some of the best one liners I've heard in the movie. Be sure to listen carefully...

Question of the Day: Powerful or Sexy?

Would you rather be powerful or sexy?

Mattie's answer: Powerful.

Of course this is coming from the female perspective - but to me, being powerful is sexy. Especially in my mid-20's as I transition into complete and total adulthood, I believe that if you're too sexy or too attractive you can't be taken seriously. Now I get it. There a re just some people out there who are sexy. That's just what they do. At the end of the day though you're going to respect and hold the person in charge in high regard.

Now please don't misunderstand me. There's nothing wrong with being sexy. I just wondered if you had to pick one of them which one would the majority of people choose. I think that sexiness is so instantaneous and by nature the first thing we respond to. It responds to us at an emotional level and we all know making decision off of our emotions is not a good look.

With someone who is powerful, you're usually intrigued. Women love a man who's in charge because we like security. Men tend to respond to women who are in power because they can relate and seldom do they come across women who are just as powerful or more powerful than them. (And a lot of times, to men, that can be intimidating.)

Sexiness is less likely to be considered powerful than being powerful is to be considered sexy but it's possible to be considered both. I think that's why someone like Beyonce is into someone like Jay-Z. Sure, Jay may not be the most attractive guy in the world but he's powerful. He's about business. And his sexiness sure doesn't meet Beyonce's sex appeal. However, if he wasn't powerful, I think it's safe to say they wouldn't be together. That's just my opinion.

At the end of the day, the big difference is respect. When you're powerful you're respected and when you're sexy you're momentarily desired. Think of it this way: would you rather learn how to be sexy or how to be powerful? I'd much rather have Oprah teach me what she knows than Marisa Miller.

I'm just saying.

Honeymoon Location: Where Should I Go?

So, with the wedding rapidly approaching (can you believe it?! - only 9 months left...) the fiance and I were talking about where we should go for the honeymoon. The plan is to vacation there for a week after the wedding. Now I've mentioned a few places and he's pretty easy going and agreed to pretty much anywhere. (As long as it's financially within reason.)

I've narrowed it down to four...

South Africa. This was originally our first choice. Only because who can really say they've been to South Africa for their honeymoon? It's not a likely honeymoon location but from what I've heard and seen...it's beautiful.



Italy. Romantic, right? I say Rome.



He says Florence. I'm just glad we've agreed on Italy as a whole.



Disneyworld. Ok I know that may seem cheesy but he's never been before and I haven't been since I was four. And c'mon...is this place ever really disappointing?



Jamaica. Do I really even need a reason?


Where do you think we should go? Help!

Yes, Suri!

I'm usually not a fan of paparazzi getting celebrity babies because I worry about their safety but these pics were too cute to not share. Suri Cruise is one fabulous tot. Peep her dress and her shoes...Katie Holmes is a mother. Crazy. I could have sworn she would have been Joey from "Dawson's Creek" forever. Apparently not. She looks kind of old in these flicks - of course I am comparing her to her 2-year-old daughter.

I digress.

The fiance swears I want a baby, but I just keep on running into really cute babies. What's the harm in that?

So maybe I do want a baby. Sue me...

The Little Black Dress

I've been meaning to write a post about this. But after watching 'Tim Gunn's Guide to Style' and seeing Khloe's picture I thought I'd finally take the opportunity.

Ladies, we must recognize how important the little black dress is. According to Wikipedia, the dress was made popular in the 1920's by designer Coco Chanel. Before that, black was really only used for funerals to mourn. But as time went on black became classic was ideal when technicolor movies were popular. Black was the only color that was not distorted when on camera.

80 years later, the LBD is still undeniable. If you don't have one I THOROUGHLY suggest that you get one. I have a couple LBDs and I think it's safe to say that it's an essential staple to have in your closet.

I suggest you get different styles. I have an A line silhouette, a pencil and mini version of the LBD. ALl three of these can be used to go out and of course certain cuts for certain occasions. It's nice because you can throw a cardigan or blazer on top and make the look more conservative maybe for church or a work function perhaps. Or you can wear a shorter style with a shrunken jacket for a night on the town with the girl.

Seriously there is so much you can do with an LBD. But be sure that when you do find one it's strong enough to be worn by itself. (I prefer to stay from spaghetti strap styles.)

If you're small like me a strapless version or even a sleeveless number with narrow straps is ideal. If you're gonna do sleeves keep it short or 3/4. (Long sleeves get overbearing when you're small) You also want to make sure that your dress fits you tight enough that you look like a woman but loose enough that you look like a lady. That rule is for everyone but especially for petite women. Loose clothes on a small frame is a big faux pas. Pencil dresses are great especially if you have a boyish figure because it creates the illusion of hips. For my fellow short ladies out there, make sure that you dress is cut right at the knees or right above the knee. Anything past your knee will make you seem shorter and stubby.

For my curvy ladies, if you're gonna go strapless think A line. The A line silhouette is great because it creates the illusion of the narrow waist. When it comes to sleeveless keep a wider strap so your shoulders don't look bulky. (I hate that.) When it comes to a pencil number, I say go with short sleeves or 3/4 lenght sleeves. But don't forget about the turtleneck look. Looks great on any figure and goes great with a blazer or sweater over it, but most importantly it makes a statement by itself like the one Khloe has on.

Pair your LBD up with some basic black open toe sandals, colorful pumps or metallic booties and it looks awesome!

That's thing about a little black dress. It goes with everything.

Kodak Moment: Family Potrait

::Daddy, me, Maya and Mom::

So on Sunday my parents and sister were in town. While my mom was at a meeting for my aunt's wedding, Daddy and Maya (my sis) came over. It was my dad's first visit to my apartment, so naturally I was a little nervous.

All went well...in fact he (my dad) invited the rest of the family over. Which was fine, except we live in a one bedroom apartment. Anyways, per usual my dad couldn't resist the photo op of family being together and he started snapping away. Here, the fiance captured the four of us (which at the time seemed corny because it was so staged) but now that I look at it, this is one of those pictures I'll cherish forever.

Thanks, Daddy.

Mattie: The Grown Up

Pearls always make an outfit more feminine, whether you're in a skirt or pants.

Shoes can make or break an outfit. T-straps are a classic style that works for almost any season.

I had a talk with one of my good friends from back home in Pittsburgh about clothes and make up. She explained to me how she didn't really wear make up and how she's become pretty casual because of the kids. Now, she's moved to a new city and starting a new chapter in her life. First, she plans to revamp her wardrobe.

I explained to her that I was transitioning myself. It dawned on me that I'm 24 and that I'm, um, a grown up. In a year, I'll be somebody's wife and who knows in two years I may be someone's mother as well.

We continued the conversation discussing our dreams and aspirations. I explained to her that I had changed up my wardrobe and daily routine to stay on the track of accomplishment. If you're in sweats or sneakers, no matter how good a game you talk and how smart you are, it will be overlooked because of your appearance. Especially as a woman.

These past few months I've been dressing up (more conservatively) - meaning my hair, makeup and clothes are good enough to have a respectable conversation or meeting with someone important. Someone once told me, "you've got to dress for the part you want."

I may not be that millionaire CEO yet, but I sure am going to dress like I am. Now, don't get me wrong...I rather throw on some denim and a graphic tee any day, but there are times for that. When I'm on my day to day routine, out in the world, I represent Mattie, Inc. and I'm the CEO. When you dress to impress and take yourself seriously, people have no choice but to take you seriously also.

I then learned something about my friend that many women deal with: she didn't really wear make up because she didn't really know how to put it on. It's seriously a 5 minute process. You don't have prepare stage make up for your day to day life. I gave her some tips...which I'll share soon and she was shocked that it was so easy.

All in all, I've learned that not only am I dressing like a grown up I actually am one.

Biltmore Hotel in Atlanta

The Georgian Ballroom at the Biltmore Hotel

So sure, according to myself I may not exactly be in 100% wedding mode quite yet. However, I did find the absolute most fabulous and wonderful place ever for my reception.

The Biltmore Hotel.

It's PERFECT! It's everything I want - it's classic, romantic, fairy tale and it's seriously the only place that hasn't disappointed me yet. (Since I've been on the search for the perfect reception site.) What's great is that they have 2 ballrooms that you can get for a fairly reasonable price which would be great because then I could have the wedding in one ballroom and then have the reception in the other. Not to mention, there's a lovely for our guests to have cocktail hour while we take pictures.

It's the quintessential reception site.

I'm not gonna lie, it's pricey...which I'm learning weddings are (especially in today's economy). But after comparing it to some of these hotels...it's seriously our best bet. In a nutshell, I'm not going to rest until the Biltmore is mine!

I guess I do have that bride gene in me after all.

My apologies...

I'm sorry folks. Between work, my other blog, starting my Mary Kay business, sleeping and eating I've become a horrible blogger within the past week. (Since I haven't post anything...) I will do whatever I humanly can to make sure I at least put up one post a day. Of course, I will try to do more. Like now.


It's 1:27 am.


The life of blogger. Gotta love it.

Can You Help Me?

So after coming back from NYC where you can eat every kind of food POSSIBLE, a friend had an issue with picking a meal at a Thai restaurant. She confessed that she didn’t really enjoy her meal and that she really isn’t good at picking her meals whenever she goes to new restaurants. I decided to write about it…

And share my tips with the world.

Look for what you like. First and foremost, read the menu. Give yourself and the restaurant a chance. At the Thai restaurant last week, they didn’t really have what I wanted so I looked for food I was familiar with. If you’re not familiar with the fried peanut sauce and you don’t even favor peanuts like that anyway: stay away. I’m all about trying new things but base it off of what you like. Completely foreign foods are like playing the lottery…hitting the jackpot is seldom. I ended up ordering the Chinese broccoli with chicken. I’ve had Chinese food before and I like chicken. Go figure. Granted the dish had a little more greens (aside from broccoli) than I anticipated but it was delish!

Ask what’s good. After reading the menu thoroughly you realize that they you don’t see anything you are familiar with or would order. That’s when you starting asking questions. Ask the date you’re with, the friends you came with or your waiter what the popular dish of the day is or what the restaurant is known for. The first night I was in the city, I went to this chic Spanish restaurant and asked what good appetizers they had. Turned out they were known for their grilled corn with chili powder. I was a little apprehensive about it (especially the chili powder) but it turned out to be the most delicious corn I’ve ever tasted. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, you might miss out on good corn.

Smell around. Maybe I’m the greediest human being on earth but when I enter a restaurant I use all five of my senses. But I notice that smell usually will dominate all of the senses and conquer me into ordering whatever that sweet aroma maybe. Fresh bread, baked chicken, fried seafood…all of these have a distinctive smell and make my mouth water. Look around and see what’s on people’s plates (especially the folks sitting right next you) and you may find what you’ve been smelling all along.

Meat and potatoes. Rarely does this ever fail. Everyone has had a burger and fries and it’s a combination that usually leaves their customer satisfied. It’s familiar and a lot of restaurants carry it. Believe me I know. I’ve been eating that combo since I was 3 and just step out of its boundaries when I was 21. Hey, they’ve never let me down so why would steer away from that? (To try something new, duh.) If it’s not a burger and fries, most eateries have steak and mashed potatoes or some kind of traditional meat and potato meal that you grew up on.

Copycat it. If don’t see anything you like, you can’t build up the nerve to ask what’s good, nothing smells good to you and they have the audacity to not have the All-American cheeseburger on their menu, find something familiar on anybody’s plate and tell your server, “I’ll have what they’re having.” Sure, not being original is lame but saying it like that makes you sound like you’re talking about something. Hopefully, you’ll end up liking it and coming back to the restaurant because their chicken and broccoli with peanut sauce and jasmine rice is to die for.

Or make the person you copied pay for the crap and use the money you saved to buy a number three at the nearest McDonalds five minutes later.

It’s a win-win situation.

Looking Good and Feeling Fabulous

Back from NYC, I was looking good and feeling fabulous fresh from NYC in my new office at home. Just passing along some love and showing off a little...

NYC!

Yes, yes. I know. I’ve been promising to post more regularly and it’s been about a week or so. But people I’ve been in my favorite place EVER…that’s right: New York City.

I’ve been having the time of my life. Dealing with people traffic, eating sandwiches from the deli at your local bodega and going out every single night. But honestly that’s not what it’s about. Aside from the shopping and the amazing opportunities, I have seriously met some of the most interesting and best people that are now some of my good friends. It’s funny because a lot of people expect New Yorkers to be a**holes but they’re not. They’re just always in a rush. But once you get a minute from them they’ll more than likely be willing to talk, help you get where you need to go or commit a random act of kindness.

Shocker…I know.

But it’s true. There’s no way a little lady from a small town in PA (me) came to this city three years ago and made it on her own with no family living there in a city full of a**holes. Of course, there are your occasional sour grapes but you can find those anywhere. But think about it, if New Yorkers were all so bad would 8 million people be living there?

Didn’t think so…

Today Was A Good Day!

Um, please excuse the random piece of hair sticking up. Other than that...enjoy the specs and get inspired. SUBSCRIBE please!!!!!

How Powerful Words Can Be

I’m going to do my best, but this is going to sound a little cliché especially since I’m a blogger/writer.

WORDS are incredibly powerful. The way we say them, how we write them, even the way we take them. Never underestimate how much power you possess with your words. Whether you’re giving a speech or telling a story – those things can have lasting effects. Even paying someone a compliment can make a difference in their day, their week…maybe even in their life. I think we take for granted how we talk to people because it’s such a social norm to speak to folks just to break random silence as we pass people by walking in the grocery store, interact with them while we’re shopping or thanking them for doing something as little as opening the door for us. It’s gotten to the point where people are so jaded sometimes that they don’t pay attention to the fact that you’re actually paying attention to them.

Maybe I’m an emotional freak of nature but when I ask you how you are, nine times out of ten I actually want to know. I’m just not talking for the sake of hearing myself talk. I take common courtesy extremely seriously and it pisses me off that I’m not worth 2.3 seconds of your time that you can’t even thank me for holding the elevator for you. Am I angry?

Yes, people.

You’ve got to pay attention to how you affect people with little words such as “thank you” or “you look really nice today”. They can make such a big difference. Why has it become so hard for us as a generation to be nice to each other and more importantly use our words legitimately and for good use? (Now, I’m not saying go out of your way to lie to someone just to be considered "kind".) I’m just saying don’t let this technology saturated, pop culture obsessed, money driven world taint you to the point where you let courtesy completely escape you. All we care to talk about these days is ourselves: what we’ve done, what we’re doing and better yet what someone can do for us.

It’s disappointing, but I've got hope for us.

I’ve probably watched a little too much Oprah (as if you can) but feeling empowered and feeling good about myself is refreshing especially when it comes from an unexpected source. Surprise someone today…and say something nice. Not because you have to, but simply because you have the power to do so.

Someone Save The Music Industry!

Reasonable Doubt

Man and woman meet. Then they date. Simultaneously, they fall in love. Man proposes. Woman says yes because she thinks it’s the right thing to do.

They live unhappily ever after.

Love. That’s what all us emotion driven creatures, women, want. Naturally, by universal social norm the next step is marriage. But just because you love someone doesn’t mean you should marry them. He proposes and she declines even though she loves him. It doesn’t make sense.

Like the cynical Miranda of SATC said, “Why is that reasonable doubt can get you out of murder but in an engagement can turn you into the bad guy?”

Now, I’m not engaged but I have been proposed to once. I was 19, and I just broken up with my boyfriend at the time because after a year of dating I was tired of him wanting to break up every time he got mad at me. So, his attempt to get me back was proposing and giving me the choice of whatever ring I wanted. Now make no mistake, I loved this guy but this wasn’t the answer. We weren’t making it as boyfriend and girlfriend and chances were becoming husband and wife wouldn’t have made us more compatible. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have even made it down the aisle – it would have been a very short lived engagement. I loved him, but even at 19 I knew that wasn’t enough.

Society puts us – women- between a rock and hard place: a ring and a vulnerable man on bended knee. How does one say no to that? It’s honestly the biggest set up ever. (Seldomly does the woman ever propose to the man and if she does…well that’s another article at another time.) That being said, men don’t feel this type of pressure. Sure it’s tough to propose to someone but so is having a menstrual cycle and bearing children. Recognize that love is not enough and that money isn’t everything. If you realize that you care about this person but just not enough to enter marriage with them, go ahead and break it off. Regardless of how much you love them, the chances of reconciliation of a successful and healthy relationship after turning down a marriage proposal are slim to none – no matter what a best friend, talk show host or a fortune cookie told you.

My advice to men: Get your timing right and most importantly, get the right woman. Make sure your lady wants to be asked in the first place. If not, you may feel rejection like you never felt before.

And to my fellow ladies: Really know what you want and OWN it. Just because you want to get married doesn’t mean you can handle a proposal. I think that’s why most women cry when they’re being asked.

It’s because they’re confused.

Look, some people are meant to date and some are meant to marry. Separate the two. (And if you are going to be with someone for 15 years, go ahead and marry them. It’s the respectable thing to do.) 50% of American marriages end up in divorce. Would the number of divorces have been lower had some of those women said ‘no’?

Take it from a woman who really wants to get married but will turn you down just to not become a statistic – even if she loves you. It’s not worth it, because I am. The question is: are you?

Woman gets divorce and moves on. She meets another man. Man and woman date. They fall in love. Man proposes and woman accepts because not only does man love her but is willing to work to keep them together.

And that’s how you live happily ever after.

Happiness...is it all it's cracked up to be?

Is there ever a good enough reason to compromise your happiness?

Being that it is a few days after my 24th birthday, earlier I stopped and reflected all that I’ve been through. Living in 5 different countries, attending various elementary schools, minor injuries and major mosquito bites, a bee sting, butting heads with two conservative parents, sharing secrets with a free spirited sister, five learning experiences called relationships, remaining television free on weekdays until the age of 18, a stint at Penn State then taking three years off, sporadically living in New York then moving down to the A where it seems like I have started all over again. And after all that reminiscing I’ve realized that I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.

Regardless of how much money I don’t have, how many people don’t approve and where I’m supposed to be in life, I no longer let any of that affect my contentment. I know there are books on how to obtain it and society has made us believe that it is such a hard notion to acquire but in all actuality, it’s not that hard.

Okay, maybe I’m biased because I’m the happy person. But I realized in my past experiences that my happiness really depends on me, but because I believed it was on someone or something else it was compromised. At the end of the day, there’s never a good enough to compromise your happiness. If you love to dance, someway somehow you should be dancing everyday. If you love to sing, the shower should be your stage and people should be telling you to stop singing so much on a daily basis. I love to write so I will make sure I write a little something everyday (well at least 5 days out of the week) whether it’s a blog post, a song or a journal entry. In this day and age where you can make a billion dollars off of a little idea called Facebook because you liked networking with your friends via PC because computers make you happy – you can’t afford you not do what you love. Well, you can but you may miss out on a big payout.

Of course, like I said before I’m happy so maybe you shouldn’t take it from me. But have a little conversation with yourself, develop a life plan and point out distinctively what makes you happy. What do you enjoy doing? It’s so funny because after working for the man for so long and catering to your family, friends or spouse/significant other’s needs you become lost and ignorant to what really made you happy in the first place. Take some time to figure it all out and trust me it’ll be worth it. If not, just stop worrying about what other people say, don’t psych yourself out if you’re tired, lazy or scared of it and accept happiness for what it is. The things you once thought would thrill you may not be all you ever dreamed of and maybe that one thing you never thought you’d give a chance can give you that peace you’ve needed all along.

In hindsight, maybe happiness isn’t so easy to obtain because as they say you’ve got to go through the rain to get a rainbow. But I’m telling you, once you get through that storm, smooth sailing has never felt so good.

So to answer my own question, there is absolutely no reason good enough to compromise my happiness. Because I wouldn’t trade it for the world.